How to make the biggest impact on your relationship starting tonight.

Many couples suffer from A.D.D. Admiration Deficiency Disorder. Intentional or not, couples get stuck in the day to day life. Driving the kids to soccer, figuring out meals and dealing with the stresses of work and extended family.

One of the deficiencies that happens rather quick is the expression of admiration to the partner. In fact, admiration and daily appreciation is the antidote to contempt, one of the 4 horsemen, according to Dr. Gottman.

By making a conscious effort to cultivate admiration in your relationship, partners can enhance intimacy, deepen their emotional bond and create an environment that both partners feel valued and appreciated. Sounds amazing, doesn't it?

Dr. Gottman's research has shown that a strong sense of admiration is a key factor in predicting the success of a marriage. He suggests that couples who maintain a mutual sense of respect and appreciation are less likely to divorce.

So what does expressing appreciation actually look like? It could look something like this:

"I appreciate the care you took this morning in getting the kids off to school while letting me sleep in. I really needed that rest".

In this example, the emphasis on the appreciation is care. The partner felt cared for. Likely felt connected and understood. It is not just simply saying thank you. It is expressing the actual act and, more importantly, the adjective that described the partner. The adjective used here in this example is caring.

Daily expression of admiration is the antidote to contempt. Contempt being the number one marriage breaker according to Dr. Gottman's research.

So if your relationship is suffering from Admiration Deficiency Disorder, start today! Share with your partner something specific from today that you appreciate. And do it again tomorrow. Watch how your relationship will become closer, you will feel more connected and how less contempt there may be in your marriage.